Life partner: a best friend; confidant; non-sexual soulmate; your bro; your gal pal; the Ann Perkins to your Leslie Knope; the Fred Armisen to your Carrie Brownstein; the J.D. to your Turk.
1. You know what they’re about to say by the expression on their face. There’s a 99% chance they’re making the classic Jim Halpert face as well.
2. They won’t let you leave the house with eyebrows you’re not proud of. If you’ve accidentally gone tweezer crazy (it happens so FAST), they’ll give you their personal pencil to fill those puppies in.
3. You’ve spent enough time with them to know that certain time of day when their blood sugar plummets, so you don’t take their grouchiness to heart.
4. They’ll tell you that even though you want to pull off boyfriend-style jeans, very few can, and they really don’t flatter your figure. You’ll also be reassured that those BDG jeans from Urban WILL stretch out after the initial wear (God willing).
5. They’ll cut you off when you’ve had too much to drink—even pry the cup out of your grip if they have to. If you’re out having a good time, you’ll fight them on this, but the phrase, “YOU’LL THANK ME TOMORROW” shouted in your face usually does the trick.
6. You have so many inside jokes that if you break them out in front of company others will play along and say, “Haha, what’s that from again?” and you’ll say, “Uhh..it’s from…us being weird…”
7. You’re always available to one another to talk about gastrointestinal matters, and they’re the only person you’d ask to identify that unsavory looking rash.
8. Snapchats and Facebook posts from their parents are a regular thing, and you enjoy going home to their house almost as much as your own.
9. Since you do almost everything together, you owe each other so much money that you’ve just stopped keeping a tab. Venmo won’t even let you interact anymore—it just says, “We’re at capacity” and then the app quits unexpectedly.
10. Even though they make the best wingman or wingwoman, when the end of the night rolls around, you just want to watch Netflix and eat snacks with them.