Ten Perks of Being The Third Wheel

We always talk about third wheeling like it’s a bad thing, but no one ever mentions the perks, like free tickets and popcorn to yourself.

1. You Get A Lot Of Compliments

I don’t know why, but there’s something about sitting across the table from couple friends that makes them shower you with compliments like, “You’re hair looks great today,” or “Is that a new top? It really brings out your eyes.” Maybe it’s out of pity, or maybe it’s because you’re the only subject in focus, but it’s always welcome.

2. You’re Guaranteed Great TV Recommendations

Couples are always watching shows with each other— it’s like a couple thing. They always love to talk about what they’ve recently started watching, so you’re never left without a Netflix recommendation.

3. It’s Easier To Get A Dinner Reservation

Three people is less than four. Thus, less time spent waiting for a table. Usually.

4. You Don’t Have To Share Popcorn With Anyone

Does this even need explaining?

5. If There’s An Extra Ticket For A Show, You Usually Get It

Tom got sick and can’t go see “The Book of Mormon?” You’re the go-to friend for his spare ticket—it’s just going to go to waste if you don’t take it! You’ll keep your friend company and see a free show. Win win.

6. You Gain a Deeper Psychological Understanding of Yourself—Like Therapy, But Free!

Sometimes, when you’re out with your couple friends, you might find yourself wondering why you’re single. This is totally normal. In fact, this self-examination is good for you, and the forced psychoanalysis is cheaper than a therapist. Just make sure you keep it to yourself—no one wants to hear about your introspection.

7. You Can Be Late! No One’s Keeping You On Schedule!

Let’s be honest: In a relationship, there’s usually one person who’s on time, and one person who’s late. You know who you are. When you’re single, meeting friends out means that no one is going to get you there early, or force you to be late! You can finally arrive at your leisure.

8. You Don’t Have To Pretend To NOT Be Broke

In the initial stages of a relationship, you probably want to make a good impression financially, as in, you have a job, good spending habits, or maybe you simply aren’t afraid to look at your account balance. All good things. Now, when you’re out with just your couple friends, they all know the truth. There’s a mutual understanding that no one can afford their rent, and no one really knows what a second mortgage is.

9. There’s No Limit To The Amount Of Froyo Toppings You Can Take

Maybe you and your friends frequent 16 Handles after a nice dinner out. Since you don’t have a date, there’s no need for that “original” flavor with two blueberries bullsh*t. Go straight for the chopped Twix, Cap’n Crunch, marshmallow drizzle, etc. The world is your oyster.

10. You Can Avoid That Awkward “Who should pay?/Let’s split it/ Wait, I thought you were taking me out/You’re weird about money/It’s fine, let’s just split it” Sh*t Show

We’ve all been here. The check arrives, and your initial reaction is to split it. But wait, didn’t the other person say they were treating? Oh, maybe not—maybe you misheard them in the car on the way over? It’s fine, you think. You can pay for yourself, thank you very much. An awkward pile up of credit cards unfolds, and suddenly everyone is very uncomfortable. When you’re single, you just pay for yourself, because you’re worth it.



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s