If you’ve been following our blog (we certainly do), you might have seen the name Mate Kieher or Kate Mieher, the second of which is actually accurate, thrown around. Let’s catch all of you who haven’t met Kate up to speed. We form a dynamic trio, essentially. The Leslie Knope of our lives, Kate has always been there to guide us through our college struggles and our unsuccessful transition into adulthood. However, Kate is currently abroad in Spain, and we are failing to make rational decisions. She is undoubtedly the sanest member of us three and never fails to assume the mom position when we seem helpless, which is, like, all the time. We have many stories and episodes that perfectly encapsulate our best friend, Kate, but we’ve had to narrow it down to just a few.
Merilla goes weeks without a laptop
Three weeks ago, Merilla’s laptop crashed while updating her software. She kept saying she would go to the Apple Store and managed to go three full weeks without getting it fixed. When we told Kate about this via WhatsApp, she yelled at Merilla for waiting so long to get it fixed and being lazy. That’s the kind of push we lack in our lives currently. Our laziness is being enabled. If Kate were back here at school with us this semester, there’s no doubt Merilla would have gone to the Apple Store the day after her laptop broke.
Rachel doesn’t know how to park a car
The three of us went to Rachel’s hometown of Tampa, Florida last Spring Break and had a fun week of beachin’, chillin’, and watchin’ Family Feud. One day, we decided to actually go out into the world to the Salvador Dali museum. Rachel, who rest assured does have her license, drove and managed to do pretty well until we got to the parking lot. There, she tried to park (not parallel park…just normal parking in a lot) in between two cars. She…had some trouble. Kate finally stepped up, kicked Rachel to the passenger seat and parked the car herself. If we had let Rachel park, we probably would have been waiting 30 minutes and have had to deal with the scratch marks we left on the bordering cars.
Rachel and Merilla take on April Fools: Freshman Year Edition
So, Kate’s unofficial role as our mom away from home has its perks (for us) and downfalls (for her). We act like mischievous children sometimes, especially when April Fools Day comes around. Kate is, though we love her, quite an easy target. Freshman year, we convinced her for a solid 48 hours, courtesy of Merilla’s A+ acting and Rachel’s convincing texts, that Rachel was pregnant. Though we did this for a joke, Kate actually took it very seriously and told us both that she would take care of it. She sketched out a plan for us to go to Planned Parenthood together and figure out the situation. It’s good to know that if either of us were really in a sticky situation, Kate would help us out, no questions asked. That’s a dedicated friend if we’ve ever seen one.
Rachel and Merilla take on April Fools: Parts II, III, and IV
So, after this successful April Fools prank, we were amped for the next three April Fools pranks. Sophomore year, we wanted to fake Merilla’s kidnapping after a crazy night out and actually got the entirety of our freshman floor in on it. Everyone supported this endeavor even though it never actually came to fruition — probably for the best, because Merilla was willing and ready to get the cops involved for the sake of the joke, but Rachel was not about it. Junior year, since we would be abroad a different semester than her, we planned something simple — getting really dumb, (fake) matching tattoos and Skyping Kate in to see them. Senior year is where Merilla lost Rachel completely. She wanted to fake having murdered someone and needing Kate’s help covering it up, taking full advantage of Kate’s willingness to immediately help her friends in need. If we had actually followed through with these ideas, we would have gotten ourselves in deep sh*t and Kate would probably have hated us for eternity. We clearly need some guidance in our life. Otherwise, we would make some pretty shady decisions.
Kate teaches Rachel and Merilla history, politix and maps
Kate is a history and American politics major, so she constantly bestows her knowledge onto us. Rachel has an extensive knowledge of US History, as she listens to the Hamilton soundtrack on a daily basis. Merilla, on the other hand, knows that Abraham Lincoln was a vampire hunter as a side gig to being the prez. Kate taught us how voting works, who our local Congressmen are, and what a two-party system is. Bonus: she taught Merilla how to read a map.
Kate is Beyoncé
“Whatever. I’m Beyoncé anyway.” -Kate Mieher 2k15. Yes, this is an actual thing that she said. No, there isn’t any context given.
Finally, we’d like to end with the song about Kate that we created freshman year. Ask us in person for a live performance — it really adds to the experience. We call this piece “Ode to Kate”.
My name is Kate *clap* My name is Kate *clap* And I like politics. *clap* *clap*
My name is Kate *clap* My name is Kate *clap*. And I watch Teen Wolf *clap* *clap*
My name is Kate *clap* My name is Kate *clap* And I’m so basic *clap* *clap*
My name is Kate *clap* My name is Kate *clap* And, “hey, did you guys know that I went to India?”
*Yes, we Insta every photo we take together. Sue us.
Stay weird, y’all.