Grace’s Unofficial “Lord of the Rings” Drinking Game

The first half of this semester has been fun at times, but not exactly relaxing. At the time that I’m writing this, I have to prepare for three midterms and a project. But by the time this article is published, I’ll have already done everything and be on my way back home, so go future me. But throughout this semester, I have been looking forward to one, beautiful event: my Lord of the Rings marathon, which will occur on Tuesday, March 17.

Now, I’ve seen the LOTR series so many times that I’ve lost count, and yet I’m still super excited for what is sure to be a great day of pajamas, Nutella, and the extended editions. In case anyone else is going to partake in an LOTR marathon over the break, I’ve devised a fun drinking game (or in my case, a Nutella-eating game) for the movies. Here goes:

Beginner’s round – eat a spoonful of Nutella every time

  1. Sam says “Mr. Frodo.”
  2. Aragorn’s hair gets in his face.
  3. Gandalf looks super done with everyone around him.
  4. Legolas says a line that was written purely for exposition purposes, e.g., “They’re taking the hobbits to Isengard!”
  5. Pippin and Merry talk about being hungry.
  6. Someone doesn’t listen to what Elrond tells them to do.

Intermediate round – take a bite of a candy bar every time

  1. Pippin does something dumb.
  2. The good guys are saved by a latecomer ally: eagles, the riders of Rohan, convenient ghost army, etc.
  3. There are close-up shots of Sauron, just in case you forgot that a creepy sentient eye in a skyscraper is the villain.
  4. Aragorn speaks to a horse, pets a horse, rides a horse (Aragorn is basically the weird horse girl from third grade who had all the horse stickers and almost convinced you that unicorns were real.)
  5. Someone says an inspirational speech.
  6. Someone says “the race of men.”
  7. Gimli laughs like a ginger dwarf Santa.
  8. Eowyn subverts gender roles.

Sudden death (by too much sugar) round – eat a cookie every time

  1. The characters act super homoerotic.
  2. Arwen cries.
  3. Legolas makes weird faces in the background.
  4. Legolas does an awesome stunt that defies the laws of physics but looks super rad.
  5. Someone speaks in a weird, threatening whisper.
  6. There’s a scene with a bunch of people walking somewhere.
  7. Gollum is shady AF but Frodo doesn’t do anything about it.
  8. Gandalf does magic with his stick (which I suppose could technically go under the “homoerotic” category).
  9. People are called names that you can’t pronounce.
  10. There’s a beautiful cinematic shot of New Zealand.
  11. There’s a scene that feels like it’s the end of the movie but actually you still have thirty more minutes.

I can’t wait to watch my movies and be put into a beautiful sugar coma because of it. Enjoy your spring breaks, guys!


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